To everything there is a season..

Fall is loaded with possible fun for grandparents - and conversational opportunities.

Most of the country experiences some change in foliage and opportunities to rake, pile jump, repeat. One of the joys of this stage of life is that we can do the real raking after playtime when the kids are in school. Bless the mess! (Here is a photo of one year when we loaded the back of the pick up truck with leaves and jumped in!)

Collecting leaves to make a simple paste and paper picture can fill an afternoon. Fill a jar with acorns to put out in winter for the local squirrels. Cover pinecones with peanut butter and roll in bird seed for migrating birds.

Fall activities are wonderful for attendance and conversation. Phrasing questions for children is important. Try for questions that need answers other than yes/no. For example, "What did you like best about apple picking?" or "Which do you like better: choosing your own pumpkin or carving it?"

This is also a great time to invite or encourage young families to attend church as Sunday school starts up and fall calendars fill up. If you are near enough to provide transportation, volunteer. If you are long distance, teaching in your Sunday school is a great way to keep in touch with the age abilities and interested of your grandkids.

Celebrate school or sports events with notes or cards of encouragement and congratulations. Those last much longer than e-mail or phone calls!


 

End of a GRAND summer!

Off to Paris!

 Before any of the grandblessings  gets too swamped with teen stuff, Grandad and I promised  a trip overseas.  Grandchild #1 is 13 going on 14 now and ready for 8th grade. So it her choice for PARIS! (We have not been there either so this is a win-win!)

This is the culmination of the summer grandkid visits - the other 4 have been here for a variety of events they direct. And each one had an opportunity to help in some way. Even the "almost 5" counted loaves of bread and bags of chips and helped carry them to St. Mark's for the homeless shelter.


Now Paris! We have a day devoted to churches - but not only viewing but taking part in a service. Because of the liturgical structure we can attend worship in any part of the world and have a fair idea of what is going on. So Saturday noon mass at Notre Dame!

It is not necessary to be a world traveler to spend quality time with grandchildren and share faith with them. Hope you can work some one-on-one visit time in with each of yours soon!

Best people...

We are spending quality adult time with friends in Colorado - between grandkids demolition derbies and American Girl visits. It is reminding me that the best people and the longest friendships are often those made in a church setting. As we age, parents die and children get involved in their own lives. Retirement from a job, no matter how long you were there, leaves only a few people you want to see often. The good news is that there is always a body of people on Sunday who are glad to welcome us. And when church friends move, the ties are easily maintained. After all you agree on the fundamental issues of life - the rest is quirks and details. It is good to have people who tolerate aging and flaws!

I am sorry fewer of the next generation have seen the value of life long church friends, as opposed to the soccer moms and tennis buddies. When you are a long distance grandparent it is hard in a Sunday or two a year to help the little ones establish friendships in the church, but those with family in town have a wonderful opportunity in vacation Bible school. Pay the minimal fee, offer transportation and free lunch for a week. The less structured activities make a fine place for the grandkids to do some relationship building. A bonus is for them to see us volunteering as teacher, snack helper, singing leader.

I'll be Bible storyteller Priest next week at St. Mark's and plan to take the visiting Grandboy along. Just another seed of possibility.

Exciting news!

Besides writing blogs about travels and finger plays for preschoolers, I have been writing books-that-are-never-published. There was a flurry of successes back in the early 90s, including the first series of Bible board books, Baby Bible Storybook. Then while I was writing weekly sermons, publishing changed - faster, leaner and harder to break in. I am back to square 1, even with 20+ publications!

But determination (read: stubbornness!) is a gift. So in the last month I have been surprised to sign contracts with a Christian agent to do any number of books, beginning with a God Cares! board book set. This project has been in my brain for a decade and written, sent out, rejected and revised repeatedly for the last 5 years. Why continue?

Because it is the kind of book I envision my grandchildren hearing to surround their days with God's love as well as the family bonds. The day may come for all of them that parental (and even grandparental!) feet will be sighted firmly in the clay, opinions will be outdated, advice ignored. The day will come when the earthly bonds are broken. Then I hope they each dig down and find a endless source of unchangeable and unchanging love in God, perhaps in something I said or did or shared
.

Whatever your passion is - gardening or volunteer work or travel or baking - think of how you can share the activity with grandchildren so that God's love transcends and endures.

Back to Grand-nana-ing

Each summer we are blessed with a few days with each of our grandchildren individually. I love these times one on one - no siblings or mothers to interfere. The idea is not so much to spoil each one (although I think the amount of ice cream consumed might be over the home norm) as to give focused attention and be able to listen to what they have to say. We choose activities specifically for each child at the level of development and interest they have. This means I get to enjoy Chicago in all its varied glory!

This visit was the Horse Girl so we included a trail ride and horse show as well as state park hiking, movie, theater play. We watched the movies she likes without compromise and ate at restaurants we do not normally visit. And it is all great fun!

Because I am Christian grandparenting, I plan a service project of some kind for each visit - this one was buying food for 60 PADS lunches. The grocery store included "5th going into 6th grade" math and item location and estimating the total cost. Then we delivered it all to the church, demonstrating what a small part of the big process we have.

While at St. Mark's we looked at the icons on display and explored the chapel and alter and stained glass. It was not an extensive tour, but, since I had just spent time doing things important to her, she was willing to see some things important to us.

I love summer!

Not Memorial Day

I did not take a holiday yesterday from blogging or anything else. I am currently in Moshi, Tanzania,  volunteering for three weeks teaching English to preschoolers. We had a lecture today on the education system and there was one point relevant to Christian Grandparenting.

The speaker encouraged us to keep speaking English to the children no matter how young, even without comprehension. He pointed out English speaking children learn the language a sound or two at a time, encouraged by those around them. At home Tanzanian children learn the family tribal language. From ages 7-14, they are taught in Swahili. After 14 they are taught in English. The ones who do best are those who have had -  even in the very early preschool years - an exposure to English sounds. Subconsciously the base for English is there. So the work we do - in my case teaching the Hokey Pokey - is essential even if we will never know the results.

It occurs to me that introducing your faith to the grandchildren gives them the language to believe on their own later. Those who have never heard about God or Jesus or the Church or compassion or grace will struggle with the language when (if!) they are encounter it later life. If your interactions with the grandchildren, no matter how brief, include prayer, Bible stories and songs, even worship experiences, they will have tucked away a base for making a choice. The sounds and language will be there. As well as your care and love, supporting the care and love of God.

We probably won't be around to see the results, but we will know we planted a seed. God can water and make it grow!

Want to know about the trip? Blogging at rctanzania2014.blogspot.com

Nodding Nana

Still jet-lagged from Tanzania - it was a wonderful experience with preschool children in a Christian setting. I'll be posting here again next Monday, but until then take a look at rctanzania2014.blogspot.com and see the wild animals!

The Photo Box

In this digital age it is possible - and impossible - to keep up. If I made print and books and folders of every shot I have taken, we'd need a separate storage unit. How do you share what is relevant and interesting to the next generation - and the next?

By default, my mother had the best idea. She meticulously made photo albums of trips and events - shot with Brownie or eventually Instamatic! Taking one of those off the shelf seemed time consuming and daunting. No one wanted to commit to a bunch of pictures, only a few of which were really interesting. So after a polite first view, they gathered dust.

But the ones that were too silly or someone had a grumpy face or just did not fit went into a large white box. To take that box down was not a commitment. When you were tired, you stopped. More often than not these pictures showed the true spirit of the event - I really was grumpy on the trip to Colorado! And here is where my sisters and I looked anything but sophisticated at Prom. The white box was accessible and fun. If the pictures on top were boring, dig down a few decades.

So I carefully make photo books of our trips as a couple, but know they are our memories. Engaging the grandchildren is a different tactic. Look all of us they love pictures of themselves. I have a small chap album for each one that includes some infancy pictures as well as more up to date ones I change regularly. I throw them in the bag I take to restaurants, finding that the electronics go away so parents and children engage as they relive the memories. Far easier than hauling baby books!

I keep picture on the walls of our travels, pictures the children as children, and a easily changeable one with the latest of the grandchildren. They don't always look at all of them, but once in a while one will talk about doing a report on India or Yellowstone, and I am ready to walk them to the wall. I make special frames of baptisms, first communions, and confirmations.

And, yes, I keep a box of "throw away" - from several generations and printed out as I take them. Like letters and notes, it is good to have some non-electronic pictures to paw through and laugh at.

Staying relevant

I finally gave up on music.

Not that the 60's were the Best Music Years, but they were! Relevant lyrics like "she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!" They don't make 'em like that anymore...

I think as the children grew, I tried to be aware of their music - or I made them listen to oldies. Now the grandchildren are listening and moving to ....I gave up being relevant in that area. If I expend brain cells on negotiating the geezer world, I need to pick and chose where to relate to the grandkids.

My category is literature. I read at least the first book in any popular YA series and never bypass a children's department in the bookstore. I subscribe to the library's updates of children's/youth books, know my way around a graphic novel, and try to see all the book-based movies. It might not be my preferred reading, but it is worth the effort to have a conversation starter with a 12 year old!

What is your bonding speciality? CUBS batting averages? Latest Disney movies? Online gaming? The trick is to observe grandkids' interests and activities; then pick one to ramp up your credibility. (Note this is very different from talking about something you are interested in and convincing the kids to enjoy it!)


The subtle message is that you value them as individuals with tastes and opinions. Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Summer fun and service

Here come summer for the grandkids - sports, lesson, camps. Maybe even Disney! And if you are lucky, some quality time grandparents.

 If possible, it is a wonderful opportunity to have each grandchild alone, even for an afternoon. You frame the event - zoo or library or museum or board games at home. Set your cell phone aside and focus on the topics they want to discuss and the things they want to see. Memories come out of these moments.

This is also an opportunity to engage them in serving others, even in a brief and limited way. Stop by the grocery store and let the child pick 3 non perishable foods they like to eat, but buy 2 of each. Bag one set and drop off at the Food Pantry. Homeless shelter in the area? Decorate lunch bags with stickers or markers and go together to donate them. Let them drop change from a meal in a donation box and point out how it will be used. Makes cookies or a love you card for the parents! Whatever you choose, set the example and talk after about how it feels to share and care.

Have a super summer!

Far away places...come home

We are just back from a short trip in the south east: Civil War battlefields, Revolutionary wigmakers, and carriage rides on cobbled streets. The dutiful children will ask "So, how was the trip?" and may look at a few pictures, but the grandchildren are the ones who can be inspired (and - whisper - educated) if approached correctly.

Send post cards  - not the "wish you were here" scrawled message, but with just an interesting fact or two in words and handwriting kids can read. The postage rates have gone up, but 34 cents still buys a lot of smiles. Great as the electronics are, when there is real mail in the box, it is memorable. And it can start the conversation when you next talk.

Take a kids eye view of your visits. Remember kids love information about pirates, animals, and anything their parents would call "gross." Jot down stories, incidents, factoids to share in tiny bits later.

Pictures are great, but show

the ones relevant not to your interests, but theirs. Is it more fun to see the blacksmith or the wigmaker? Is life in the colonies taught in Grade 4 or 5? Which child likes horses and which one is a dancer?

Be available for reports, projects and further interest. If you are nearby, volunteer when the class learns about the start of the Civil War. Bigger projects can come alive with your power points easily sent online. Stay alert for games, craft projects, fiction books to share, enhanced by your (very brief!) stories of "When I was there..."

The day may come they will want to accompany you, or you will open the mailbox and fine...a postcard!

The Rush through May

Do you ever feel like once Easter is past, every sport's team, dance group, music teacher and  school are conspiring to make grandparents' lives complicated? How can you be at a dance recital for two grandkids and still attend First Communion for their cousin two states away? The important thing is that the grandchildren know their events and performances are important to you. Start in February or March to ask parents when teams play or once in a lifetime ceremonies will occur. They are already on the calendar!

Now how to get to "everything"? Sometimes you can divide grandparents, and each attend something. Regular music or dance recitals can be attended every other year. Savvy techno-grands may find a way to be there-but-not-really-there. Make a priority of the events not likely to be repeated, but don't "miss" the rest!

Every performer loves a flower or a whole bouquet! Some studios invite people to order them for the dancers or musicians or little thespians in advance to be delivered backstage. Bulletins, programs and yearbooks generally have small ads and "well wisher" sections that leave a black and white memory of your thoughts. Volunteer to provide snacks or drinks for the soccer team at a game you can't see in person. Put flowers on the altar or make a special contribution to honor a child's rite of passage.

Communicate! E-mail and phone calls are great for real time, but small cards of congratulations will be tucked in drawers for years. Maybe you can include a picture of mom or dad about the same age...

Have a wonderful Memory-filled May!

More than bunnies....

We followed a real donkey into worship yesterday for Palm Sunday. That is what I love most about this season. There are so many ways to grab the imagination and bring to life the events of Jesus' life. Here are some I use with children.

Move and wave in the Palm Sunday entry to Jerusalem. Spread towels on the ground and relay the story of that wonderful parade. Older children like to form crosses out of the palm branches and save them.

Taste the flat bread Jesus ate - matzo or tortilla or pita. Sample it not as Holy Communion, but to recount part of the Last Supper based on the flight of Moses from Egypt. Lots of simple stories to go with the tasting. Older children will enjoy parts of Ten Commandments - the Charleton Heston one! The Angel of Death is very creepy!

Listen to birdsong outdoors or on a CD. That was one of the sounds in the Garden of Gethsemane when Jesus prayed there. Say a very simple prayer for the new life all around you. Older children can be fascinated by the change that comes in the garden when Judas and the soldiers arrive! Where do the brave disciples go?

Touch rocks to build a mound like the rock outside Jesus tomb. It was much bigger than we can lift. How did Jesus move it? Older children can attend Good Friday services and know that "good" is from the German "Gott" meaning God's Friday.

Look at library or bookstore books which include all the stories of Holy Week. Even small children can understand how sad the disciples felt when they thought they would not see Jesus again. Older children can view videos form animated renditions to history channel docudramas. Make the Resurrection real!






However you choose to enhance your grandchild's Easter, you introduce more than bunnies. Blessings!

Sending postcards

I keep in touch on world travels with postcards to all the grandkids. Who knows what might inspire them? If I did not send you one, check the blogs at:

rcchina2008.blogspot.com
rcsouthafrica2009.blogspot.com
rcindia2010.blogspot.com
rcrussia2011.blogspot.com
rcmorocco2012.blogspot.com
rcthailand2013.blogspot.com

and this yet to be adventure:

rctanzania2014.blogspot.com

Hatched

My website at robincurrie.net

Designed by Brian Currie

Grandparenting Joys.

Introducing the Grandblessings!

Ages range from 4-14 - a pretty busy decade!

Video games, baseball, annoying his sisters.

                                                                Horses, soccer, friends.

Dancing, trucks, dirt

                                                                                 Cheering, reading, writing.

                                                                  

,

Ballet, math, roller coasters.